wtf

Next time you have a marijuana grow operation in a federal park, you'll definitely want to include a turtle and or tortoise deterrent system. From WUSA news:

You might call him a pint-sized crime fighter. A box turtle equipped with GPS helps police nab a suspect growing marijuana in Rock Creek Park.

Just south of the DC/Maryland line, a turtle wearing a GPS device for research purposes makes an amazing discovery.

"The ranger in charge of the program discovered the turtle in the middle of a marijuana field," Sgt. Robert Lachance of the U.S. Park Police says.

Cindy Gossage who's been walking the trails for years isn't surprised.

"I come back here to walk my dogs, and I've found several different marijuana fields back here."

Growing marijuana on U.S. park land is never a good idea, and it's illegal. So U.S. Park Police set up surveillance.

Sgt. Lachance says, "We soon discovered we had a culprit who was actively working the field."

Police say that culprit is 19 year old Isiah Johnson of Chevy Chase. He's now in custody and will be extradited back DC to face drug charges.

A turtle. With GPS. Amazing. Maybe next Isiah will remember to always have a guard on duty.

Strange In San Antonio reports:

I truly wonder sometimes what motivates our local news media.

Look what KSAT-12 is reporting now:

San Antonio is seeing it’s [sic] share of tough economic times this summer. AT&T is moving it’s [sic again] headquarters to Dallas. The highly touted savior of the southside, Toyota, will shuttle [I think they mean "shutter". --ed.] production until late fall. And two airlines have said goodbye to the San Antonio International Airport.

The changes, along with rising gas and grocery prices, has [sic] many worried, and wondering, when will things turn around?

It’s a question we posed to psychic Sean Harribance, who quickly zeroed in on issues surrounding the airport.

Yep. Everyone's wondering when the bad times are going to get better, and obviously the first person you're going to visit is a psychic who "in 1994 correctly predicted today’s price of a barrel of oil." 

The K-SAT article continues:

San Antonio will weather these tough economic times because businesses like to be here. As for those companies that leave, “Any company that leave … they’re gonna want to come back to San Antonio”, says Harribance. “A lot is going to happen in San Antonio”, he says, “it will be world famous for sports, medical discoveries, and tourism”.

Our mayor and city council all get the thumbs up from Harribance, who says “Most politicians do deals and contracts and they cheat .. I would say we have an honest city council and mayor”.

Still, San Antonio will see crime increase this fall, and the city raising taxes next year and in 2010. Outside the city limits, he sees large tanks used for storage, possibly water storage. And in 10 years or so, “all of downtown is going to have casinos and slot machines”, Harribance tells us.

At the bottom we find out:

Shari St. Clair and Ursula Pari contributed to this story

Are they really that bad at their jobs?

This agency gives jobs to very thick people because they're very skilled at certain things, such as winning arguments, because they never realize they've lost.